


Logan and the Sleep Deprived Puns

by Sun_Spark



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: !!!!!!!!!, And stubborn, But I hate them, Caffeine, Deceit Sanders - Freeform, Everyone Is Gay, I'm pushing delerious, Idk fam, Logan Sanders - Freeform, Patton Sanders - Freeform, Remy Sanders - Freeform, RomanSnaders, Sleep Deprivation, Sleep Sanders - Freeform, Virgil Sanders - Freeform, and italics, bold, enjoy, he's a figment, i finally figured out, it's 1:40 in the morning, nearly as delerious as logan, not a side, over worked, patton's puns, puns, the feckin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-19
Updated: 2018-06-19
Packaged: 2019-05-25 08:49:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14973512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sun_Spark/pseuds/Sun_Spark
Summary: Logan works overtime and exhausts himself, becoming delirious, the others step in, puns ensue.This was a prompt created on Tumblr by myself (remy-alagaesias-dragon-queen) and my friend (anxiousangelvirgil), this was my take on it.





	Logan and the Sleep Deprived Puns

It was just a normal day for Logan….If normal could be considered staying up for 43 hours straight to work through a complex bio-chemistry problem that absolutely **had** to be solved. Never mind that Thomas’s job had nothing to do with bio-chemistry, nor that no one had asked him to solve this issue, it **had** to be solved. And if the embodiment of Logic didn’t do it, who would? So here he was, going against every bit of instruction he had ever given Thomas on the matters of keeping a regular sleep schedule and only putting healthy and hydrating fluids in his body. At this current increment he estimated that he had remained conscious for a total of 43.25 hours and had ingested an approximation of 611 mg of caffeine in the form of 13 cups of black coffee. Well, that was almost true, he had ingested an additional 150 mg of caffeine from the large espresso coffee Remy had given him 4.25 hours earlier, so he was at a total of 761 mg of caffeine in a period of now 43.29 hours with no sleep. Really, he was a wreck. But the problem **must be solved!**

The others had had varying reaction when he had passed 24 hours of no sleep. Normally he kept to the same schedule of 16-17 hours of wakefulness and 7-8 hours of sleep per 24 hour period, but on occasion he would remain awake for 20-24 hours when a particularly difficult query came up, but not often, and not much longer than that before forcing his sleep cycle to return to normal. So once he had passed 24 hours they had begun to worry, though it had taken them until hour 27 to realize he had never gone to bed, nor moved much apart from switching between his room, the study desk, and the library.

Patton had immediately showed up with soft words and tried to coax him into going to bed.  
“Kiddo, you’ll run yourself into the ground this way.”

“I am aware of that Patton. Fear not, I am aware of how long I can go without sleep and will not over exert myself.”

Patton had frowned, “Lo, you know that’s not healthy. You just finished telling Thomas to clean up his sleep schedule two days ago!”

“I understand your concern Patton, but sometimes problems require my attention for longer periods of time. I will be fine.”

Patton acquiesced reluctantly. “Alright, just make sure you come down to dinner Lo.”

*C*C*

****

He had not, unfortunately, remembered to go down to dinner, and so Roman had come up to talk to him. Or rather, monologue at him in an overly theatrical manner.

****

“Ho there you be-spec-led nerd! Time has come for you to step aside from that upon which you work and recharge yourself with nourishment and rest!”

****

Logan had looked up at him unimpressed by the usual antics of the creative side and set his blank gaze upon the Prince who stood in a dramatic pose. He had opened his mouth to give Roman the same assurances that he had Patton, but the royal had simply run over him.

****

“Now I’ll have none of your complaints, Galileo-Gloom! So absorbed in your work are you that you have missed the call to dine with us, a clear indication that you are working far to hard!” The Prince had leveled him with a reproachful glare. “T’was it not you who told Thomas that he must maintain a sleep schedule, even on the weekends, even at the expense of creative thought? And now you break your own rules? Hmpf, I’m not impressed Microsoft Nerd!”

****

Logan leveled him with a mild glare. “My work is one of science and knowledge, Roman, not the flights of fancy that grip you in the mid hours of the night and morning. Sometimes critical thought requires that we set aside our healthier habits for a short time. Rest assured that I will return to my usual pattern of rest and nourishment when this work has been completed.”

****

The Prince grit his teeth against irritation at his job being diminished once again by the logical side, but set it aside in favor of caring for his family member. “Be that as it may specs, you cannot continue this without crashing, and crashing will not only affect you, but unbalance the rest of us and throw Thomas off as well. Now, as a Prince I cannot allow you to endanger others, nor yourself, in one of your _flights of curiosity_.”

****

The intended turn about of Logan’s own slight against Roman caused the logical sides eyebrow to tic upward, but garnered no further reaction.

****

“You’re kingdom does not include this room, Princey, and I do not require your protection. I will not harm any of you, nor myself, nor Thomas. I am fine, and I will see to my own care.”

****

Roman made to argue but Logan turned back to his work and silently dismissed him, so the prince retreated, defeated. If this continued much longer he would enlist the help of one dark knight.

****

*C*C*

****

At hour 32 Roman’s reinforcements arrived in the form of one Virgil ‘Anxiety’ Sanders, and honestly, Logan wasn’t surprised. The anxious side slipped in his room quietly, hood up and hands buried in his jacket pockets, a grim frown on his lips and a shrewd gaze in his eyes. He took in Logan’s rough and untidy appearance and pressed his lips together silently. He met Logan’s eyes with a narrowed gaze and Logan stared back at him, unyielding.

****

“Logan.”

****

“Yes?”

****

“It’s enough.”

****

Logan’s eyebrow ticed up again. “And what, prey tell, is ‘enough’, Virgil?”

****

One hand came out of a pocket to gesture in a move encompassing the whole of Logan and the desk. “This, Logan.”

****

“I haven’t the faintes-“

****

“Thomas isn’t sleeping, Lo, he can’t stop **thinking**.” Virgil’s eyes glared into his like gentle steel. “Continuing this will run him threadbare and affect the ability of the rest of us to hold him together.”

****

Logan frowned. “Thomas lies awake many nights Virgil, whether it is in the wake of some of Patton’s more emotionally charged memories, or Roman’s flights of fancy, or your attacks of anxiety.” He hadn’t meant that as a barb, but Virgil flinched all the same. “He will survive a night of restlessness. Besides, it is necessary. This query must be answered. And I am _fine_.”

****

Virgil stared at him and pointedly turned his gaze to the long since cold cup of tea with two tea bags in it, then looked back at him. “Fine huh?”

****

Logan grit his teeth. “Yes. Virgil, I am fine. Besides, this problem will be solved in a matter of hours and I will rest then.”

****

Virgil sighed in that odd way people do where their whole body seems to slump in tired annoyance. “It would still be there in a few hours, Lo, resting won’t kill you.”

****

“Things are forgotten in sleep, Virgil, as Roman could well tell you of the many plots and ideas he has lost in the realm of dreams. No, I will finish this now so there will be no question of my finishing it.”

****

“ **Lo.** ”

****

The firm edge to the dark persona’s voice had little affect on the logical side, as he turned his back and waved a hand in Virgil’s direction. “Go, Virgil. I appreciate the concern, but your pestering is not only keeping me from working, but is also prolonging the time until I shall rest.”

****

Virgil sighed again and stepped out of the room. If need be he’d later force the other side to move away from his desk and take sleep medication, but it would only do more harm than good right now, and he didn’t want to have Logan angry at him, for he knew the Logical side, for all his claims of being emotionless, could hold a grudge almost as a bad as Princey.

****

*C*C*

****

Deceit tried next. He tended to leave the other sides alone normally, and didn’t much care what they got up to. But even he began to notice the affects of Logan’s lack of sleep when 36 hours had gone by. When he went to find the teacher he found him stood before the shelves in the mindscape’s library, frantically reading through page after page of book after book. He perched himself on an arm chair and watched for a moment before speaking up.

****

“This is most certainly a **wonderful** idea, Logic.”

****

Logan glanced at him over his shoulder. “I’ll not listen to you, Deceit, for nothing you say will be useful and I am likely to be better off doing the exact opposite of what you say.” He turned back to his book as the naga-like creature made an offended sound.

****

“Now Lo-Lo, you know I absolutely **can** tell the truth, so anything I say to you **must** be a lie.”

****

Logan flicked him a bored glance briefly before scanning the pages of the book in his hand once again. “We both know you are capable of telling the truth when you wish, Deceit, so long as it is part of a bigger lie. Therefore, without knowing the end intention of your actions, I do not posses the context by which to judge when you are lying or not.” He began walking out of the library, back to his room. “Good night, Deceit.”

****

“It’s Morning, Logic.”

****

Logan paused momentarily, but then dismissed the comment as another falsehood. Behind his retreating back Deceit gazed out at the afternoon sun.

****

*C*C*C

****

At 39 hours Remy found him. Logan could never comprehend the odd creature. A creation of Thomas’s imagination, a figment, as they were called, called out only by Roman when there was a short video or some such nonsense to be made. These Figments played no role in Thomas’s personality, nor did they affect the young man’s mind or actions. They tended to remain in the Imagination, along with all the other creations of Roman and Thomas’s brainstorming. But not Remy.

****

No, this Figment had somehow left the Imagination, not only an odd feat in and of itself, as he should have no form outside of it, but odd also in the fact that he had wanted too. He, the character known as ‘Sleep’ was often to be found in the mindscape with the Sides, somehow able to interact with their world and them, even though he was nothing more than a literal Figment of the Imagination.

****

When he found Logan, passing him in the hall as the logical side moved from library to room once again, he merely peered at the logical trait over the tops of his ever present sunglasses with a frown, assessing him for a moment. Then he simply conjured a cup and pushed it into the other’s hands without a word, moving past him to the couch. Logan moved into his room, intent on continuing his work, before considering the object in his hand.

****

It was a coffee cup, and the contents were a dark mixture of espresso and milk, far stronger than he would normally like and with far more caffeine than was healthy. He raised the cup and took a sip. Real. Somehow, the liquid was as real as anything else in the mindscape, unlike the hologram like projection it, and Remy, should have been. It was caffeinated too, as he could feel it beginning to affect him.

****

He resolved to study the strange Figment at some point, as the creature broke all the rules that should have governed his very existence, but for now tossed it out of his mind to return to his work.

****

*C*C*

****

At 42.83 hours, his work was yet to be completed, but the world was beginning to blur around the edges. ‘Too much caffeine’ he thought, but did not realize that the mindscape itself was blurring around the edges. Not a dangerous phenomenon, as Thomas’s mind wasn’t on the verge of a breakdown or anything, but a worrying sign none the less. As the other three could tell, Thomas was suffering from a lack of sleep and a killer headache from a never-ending contemplation of bio-chemistry.

****

This is when they found Logan at the desk in the common area’s study, glasses crooked, shirt rumpled, tie half undone, and hair flying every which way. Virgil called his name.

****

“Logan?”

****

The logical side jerked and looked up at them, his whole body shaking from the effort as if he had no equilibrium. “Oh, Virgil….Rome-ahem-Roman, and Patt…Patton. Oh, the snek as well I see.” His gaze drifted and he scowled like a man drunk and unsure of his surroundings. “What is that fig doing over there?”

****

The other three were confused, Roman looking around everywhere, as Logan hadn’t really specified any certain place, while Patton asked Deceit what he was talking about. The half-snake shrugged, “For once, I **do** know what he’s talking about.” Virgil, however, looked at the couch and was met by a pair of caramel eyes meeting his gaze over dark glasses. “Sup?”

****

Virgil raised a brow and addressed Logan, “Do you mean Remy? The Figment from the Imagination?”

****

Logan waved a hand in the air, likely meant to be dismissive, it just appeared delusional. “Fig – Figment, what’s the difference? Neither of those things should be here. Not in the mindscape, no sir, they shouldn’t be out of their place, and his place ain’t here.”

****

The sides, plus one figment, gaped at each other. Logan was officially delirious. They looked at each other, at a loss for what to do. Then Patton got a glint in his eye and a wicked smirk that sent every instinct in Virgil, Deceit, **and** Roman telling them to retreat. The Fatherly side turned to Logan shyly, his voice a picture of innocence, if sound could be a picture.

****

“Hey Lo? Can you tell me something?”

****

Logan, who had turned back to his work and was writing notes, which were honestly chicken scratch and less decipherable than ancient runes by now, responded without looking up with a “Hmm?”

****

“What would a fermented grape let out if it was crushed?”

****

Logan didn’t even pause in his…erm…scribbling. “Nothing much, Patton, merely a little wine.”

****

Roman and Virgil’s eyes widened, Patton smirked and laughed quietly behind his hand. Deceit and Remy watched on in shock. Logan, well, Logan kept writing for a moment then froze. He slowly turned his head to stare at Patton, a look of horror on his face. Patton, was an epitome of innocence.

****

“Why, Lo, I didn’t know you could make a joke!”

****

Logan just stared at him for a moment, dropped his pen, and stood, walking numbly past them. “I’m going to bed.”

****

They all heard his door shut a few moments later. Virgil and Roman turned to Patton incredulously to see the Moral trait muffling laughs behind his hand.

****

“Padre, how?!”

****

Patton looked at Roman with amusement. “Logan hates puns Ro, especially dad jokes. I figured if he was tired enough to finish one without realizing it until it was too late, he’d give up and go to bed.”

****

Virgil stared at Patton. “That’s the most devious thing I think I’ve ever seen you do, Pat.”

****

Patton smiled, and turned to pick up Logan’s…..notes. “Well it wasn’t that good, I mean, it was quite like Logan’s papers here.”

****

Warning bells went off in Virgil’s head, but before he could stop him, Roman was opening his big mouth.

****

“How’s that Padre?”

****

“Well, it was just **tearable**!”

****


End file.
